The Choice
by LC 86
Summary: Post 'The Break-Up'. Rachel decides to make a bold move to get Finn's attention. Will it work? Will it backfire? Find out! Last Chapter and Epilogue now up!
1. Chapter 1

**Authors Note:** WOO! New Story! This is _extremely different_ than my previous stories. It does have some funny moments, but as the story goes on, it will become very dramatic. This isn't really going to be a 'sexy' story, but it will deal with some mature themes, so I'm giving it this rating. Also, this story is short. It will only be a few chapters and they will be much shorter than the chapters I usually write. Please read and let me know what you think. Thanks!

**Disclaimer:** Ryan Murphy you should really put Glee up to be publicly traded. It would be better for you and your fans in the long run.

* * *

When Cassie went down at Cheerios practice on Monday, the whole world tilted. As one of the best on the squad, she was often at the top of the pyramid and the attraction of several of the football players. She was also the head tumbler. Then everything changed when she sprained her leg. The doctors predicted she would be out for two games. TWO GAMES! And for the first time in McKinley history, the football team was _actually_ winning. And since her usual weekly excommunication of a Cheerio has left her quad looking decadently thin, Sue Sylvester needed to make a change and fast.

When walking down the halls past the gymnasium doors, Sue noticed something very important. When Rachel did the clean back handspring into a double summersault, Sue couldn't help but be mildly impressed. She was small and thin easily able to be carried up high by people of the same sex.

"That was very good Rachel," chimed Coach Beiste as Rachel finished her layout. "Have you done any gymnastics before?" The large woman asked.

"As a matter of fact, I have," Rachel declared proudly with her head held high, her back straight, her tight pony swaying back and forth. "Between private voice lesions, dance lessons, and piano lessons; I also partook in four years of gymnastic, just for fun. And to keep physically fit. Now, since my schedule is much more demanding with glee and other obligations I have a vagarious elliptical regimen to keep in shape. As well as a strict diet of protein shakes to keep my nutrition levels in check."

"Well, that's very good, Rachel," Beiste responded. Completely unsure how to react to Rachel's detailed response to a yes or no question. "I'm going to go help some of the other students now, okay?"

"Okay. Thanks Coach Beiste," Rachel finished as she when back to the front of the mat do prepare for another layout.

Lurking in the background in the doorway of the gym, Sue took notice of Rachel Berry's effortless form as she continued to perform another tumbling pass.

_How did I not notice this before Journal? Rachel Berry could easily be a temporary replacement for my squad. Sure, her fashion sense is atrocious and her dance moves could easily join Schueter's vests at the Blossom reunion; but she's insecure, easily manipulated, and self centered. All qualities I look for in a newbie to formulate from ordinary student into a competitive robot who will do any task I ask at the snap of my fingers. Congratulations Rachel Berry, you're my newest Cheerio._

Speed walking down the hall with Santana and Brittney skipping at her heels, Sue gave the two inside informants distinct instructions to have Finn Hudson walk down the hall past her office precisely 1:15; seconds after she peeks her eyes though the shades of her office window to look out to the hallway. The two Cheerios with Glee Club membership followed their instructions with perfect execution and Finn emerged at exactly the right moment…

* * *

Later that afternoon, Rachel politely knocked on the door of Sue Sylvester's office when she was summoned by Becky Jackson. "Coach Sylvester? You wanted to see?" Rachel said timidly. The last time she was beckoned to Ms. Sylvester's office, Rachel was invited to a meeting of the 'Sad Girls Club' where in which she was manipulated to continue dating Jesse even though he was New Directions' biggest competition.

"Take a seat, Rachel," Sue gestured. Rachel did as she commanded as Sue leaned forward towards the young lady, lurching threatening over her desk. "Do you know what it means to be an athlete Rachel?"

"Um, it means you're physically fit and choose to participate in a sport. And often times the barbaric cultural rituals associated with the team boding of said sport."

"That is absolutely correct, Rachel," Sue praised; causing Rachel to beam. "And the best athletes at the school have always been, and will always be, the William McKinley Cheerios."

"Okay…" Rachel shuttered in response.

"I saw your tumbling passes today in gym class, you have solid from." Sue complements.

"Thank-you…" Rachel responds, becoming increasingly more terrified by the second.

"As I'm sure you're aware, since it has been the height of news in the McKinley halls this week, one of my Cheerios has taken a serious injury and instead of fighting though like the cheerleader I thought she was, she has decided to ride the bench for the rest of the football season." Rachel nodded as Sue got up from her chair, looked out the window to the hallway and continued. "Therefore, there is now a vacancy on my squad of champions. Oh, girls have been clawing each other's eyes out for an opportunity to try out." The ego dripping from Sue's voice permeated thought the room as she turned and leaned her legs against the edge of the desk, placing herself directly in front of Rachel; shaking Rachel to her core. "You, Rachel, are a somewhat attractive, physical fit teenager with flexibility. Plus you pass my less-than-90-pounds requirement. Rachel Berry, I am asking you if you would like to be the next Cheerio."

Rachel looked up at Coach Sylvester utterly confused by the proposition asked of her. "Is this a joke? Because it's not really funny," she asked the older woman towering over her.

"This is not a joke," Sue finished grabbing the bright red, black, and white fitted uniform from behind the desk. "So are you in?"

_She can't honestly be serious. Coach Sylvester hates me and she hates the glee club. What the hell does she want with me? And why the hell does she want me to be a Cheerio. There are lots a pretty, thin girls walking through these halls every day, why on Earth would she select me? Is she really THAT despite? But then again, as I see Finn walk down the hall though the narrow rectangular window in Sue's doorway in a not at all staged attempt to say me sway my decision, I ponder the opportunity before me. The Cheerios are leaders at this school. Stars, if you will. And getting to join their little sorority might be just the practice I need for being adored by others. Plus the physical exhaustion of the rigorous practices and competitions would be perfect for getting my breath and stamina in shape for 8 shows a week in my starring Broadway debut. _

"You know what Ms. Sylvester," Rachel replied cheerfully; rising from her seat. "I'm in!" The two women shook hands and nodded in unison agreement. Rachel accepted the uniform displayed in Sue's hand and marched out of the office; preparing herself for cheer practice.

* * *

Finn Hudson was putting his book bag in his locker when Rachel walked into school the following day. She noticed him right away; like always. Then again, Finn wasn't exactly hard to miss. Thankfully his head was hidden in his locker as she shook pony-tail down the hall towards her own locker to get her books for first period. She didn't have to bring her books home anymore, because she didn't have to do her homework anymore. Because she was a Cheerio. Rachel silently admitted to herself that she could get used to this fast. She held her head high, her spine was straight, and she felt powerful. The looks she was getting in this uniform made her feel good. And, okay she still had to do some of her homework, but nearly to the level that was previously expected. Plus, some of the Cheerios did seem to carry their book bags and cheer duffels down the hall from time to time.

Finn turned around as Rachel Berry sauntered down the hall in her Cheerios uniform. Fuck, it looked really good on her. But more importantly, what the fuck was going on? Why was _Rachel Berry_ dressed a Cheerio? As Brittany and Santana walk up to Rachel, pinkies locked, Finn needed to remove himself from the scene he was watching. And fast. He slammed his lock shut, and quickly walked down the hall in the opposite direction. Storming into the choir room, Finn didn't even feel safe in here. His face fell into his hands as he slouched into a chair. He shook his head from left to right and his legs gave out from underneath him; slowing leading him onto the floor. His back and limbs sprawled out over the tile, Finn's head still rocked from side to side in disbelief. _How did this happen? And why?_

_

* * *

_

When Santana and Brittany marched up to Rachel in the hallway early in the morning, Rachel was terrified. When she accepted the offer to join the elite alliance of Cheerios, she was expecting one of two scenarios to happen; the others would either be elated or horribly angry. When _neither_ of those options occurred, Rachel was so unsure what to think about her new stance in high school standing. It also seemed like the other Cheerios were unsure as well. It was like they had to accept the fact that Rachel was a Cheerio because they didn't have a choice in the matter. And Rachel didn't have the right to say anything about the way they were treating her because she was new and she understood that she needed to earn their respect.

Anyway, when the bi-curious twosome sauntered over, they had on death glares and fear bubbled up inside of Rachel.

"Hey, Troll," Santana snarkly began as she stood in Power Stance; arms crossed over her chest, bitch-face on her features.

"Hi…" Rachel replied, unsure what to say. Unsure what they wanted with her.

"Look, just because you're wearing the uniform, doesn't mean that you're a Cheerio overnight," Santana explained.

"I though that's exactly what it meant…" Brittany slowly muses.

"I understand," Rachel concurred with Santana.

"It takes a whole lot more to be a Cheerio. But… and as much as it hurts to admit me to admit this; and trust me, it does… you didn't do bad yesterday. Not good; and certainly not great, but it was a start. Your annoyingly small frame and even more annoying big mouth are decent attributes in cheer."

"Thank-you… I think…"

"You can tumble well and do a split," Britt said.

"I am not your friend, and in my opinion you'll never have the attitude to truly be a Cheerio…" Santana began.

"But, welcome to the team…" Brittany finished, as the two walked away in the same unison in which they approached Rachel in.

Unsure how to feel about the exchange that just transpired, Rachel wasn't sure if they were being genuine or not. They kind of just _complemented_ her, that's never happened. Except for when she came to school one day dressed as Britney Spears. It just felt wrong. In **a lot** of ways this all felt wrong. Like the universe was messing with her. But a much larger part of her just didn't care. Rachel wanted to get Finn's attention. She wanted to go back to feeling happy. To feeling like she could actually get through the misery of high school. Or the misery of a high school break-up. Sure, she had some good times, but there is a numbing pain that has been festering inside since her since she was no longer one half of the cutest couple in school. And how much it's killing Rachel to see Finn every day.

* * *

Rachel had been quiet in glee club the past few weeks. She always was able to sing her emotions, but lately the only thing she felt was hurt. And it was slowly killing herself inside. It hurt. Staring at the foot holding up piano that looked like a cross between a bear paw and a fresh fall leaf, Rachel was snapped back to the reality of being it the choir room when Mr. Schuester asked her a question.

"Rachel? Rachel?" the curly haired teacher repeated trying to get her attention.

"Huh? What?"

"I said that I would like for you and Finn to figure out a duet for Regionals. It coming up in a little over a month and we really need a perfect ballad."

"Um…," She looks up to Finn on the other side of the room; a few steps up on the risers. He looks at her nervously and nods. "Okay…" Rachel replies nervously.

"Why do they get to perform the duet?" Tina asked, to the surprised, questioning brows of the rest of the club.

"Well, Tina, actually it's just a ballad performed by two people, in which I was planning on having the rest of the club join in, but would you like to be part of the duet?" Mr. Schue asked.

"Yes, I would. With Mike, if possible."

"Mike, Finn, Rachel… are you okay with that?"

"Yeah, it's fine," Finn replies. Honestly thankful to not have to sing with Rachel and be reminded of last year.

"Yeah," Rachel says fast and nervous, slightly thankful as well.

"No!" Mike says loudly, eyes popping out of his head.

"Why?" Tina asks; disappointed all over her face.

"Well… you didn't even ask me! And to be completely honest, I'm not that confidant in my singing for you guys to trust me with that much responsibility. I mean, if we were to lose and not get to New York because of me, I would feel horrible. It's too much pressure."

"But I would be there with you there the whole time," Tina explains to Mike taking his hand.

Rachel—in her immaculate Cheerios gear, complete with tight, high ponytail – takes a deep breath, looking up at Finn longingly. He meets her gaze and breaths in as well. No one else seems to notice.

"Please think about it," Tina finishes with hope. Mike nods in return.

"Okay… think about it Mike. We still have a little time." Will states. "Okay, moving on. Since this week is the Super Bowl. One of the biggest cultural, musical, and sporting events of the year; I thought it would be appropriate for you guys to come up with a number that was a reenactment of a famous Super Bowl Half Time Show from the past." Santana looks over to Puck and raises her eyebrows. "And note that I said 'famous', not 'infamous', therefore, recreating Janet Jackson's wardrobe malfunction is out." Mr. Schue finishes to disappointing groans from some of the students. The bell rings and students start to file out of the choir room. "Please be prepared with some Super Bowl ideas to-morrow," Will calls out, but there's no point. They've all left and stop listening.

* * *

**A/N:** So… what did you think? Thank-you so, so much for reading. I hope you enjoyed it. And even if you didn't, please let me know what you thought. I know it's just a start, BUT any feedback is great for a writer. And personally always pushes me to do better. There will be more of this story up very soon. I'm hoping to have it done before new episodes and I'm already cooking on the next few seconds. Thanks again. Please review! :)


	2. Chapter 2

**Authors Note:** Thanks so much for the review and the alerts! I promise I would have a new chapter up soon, and that actually happened. But, like I said, the chapters are short. Obviously much shorter than I normally write, but hopefully there will be a new one up by the weekend. Please review and let me know what you think. Things are getting a little bit more dramatic! Oh, and **I DO NOT read spoilers**, but I do know that _Glee _is doing a Super Bowl episode and a Valentine's Day episode, so my invasions of what might happen in those will be in this story.

**Disclaimer:** Ryan Murphy you should really put _Glee_ up to be publicly traded. It would be better for you and your fans in the long run.

* * *

It was the last week of January and rehearsal for the Super Bowl assignment in Glee was going well. Puck insisted that he reenacted when Michael Jackson wouldn't take off his sunglasses. The rest of Club wanted to reenact The Who's _CSI_ music medley. Overall the combination lead to a very fun project for the club and Mr. Schue even felt that one of the songs could be used for Regionals. Finishing up one of the numbers, Finn caught Rachel when she ovrespun one of the dance moves. It was the first time he had held her in weeks and Rachel was overjoyed, but Finn was more so awkward and distant. He was just making sure she didn't fall off the stage and Rachel hated the fact that she understood that.

In the gymnasium, the student body of William McKinley High School gathered for the winter Pep Rally. It was the first time the Football Team was doing well and Principal Figgins wanted the students to show their support. And to hopefully get their parents to write big, fat checks towards the school in regards to the football team. School sports equals fundraising, damn it! Finn and the rest of the football team in their varsity jackets sat on the bleachers looking over at Mr. Figgins to begin the proceedings.

"Quiet down, Students. Quiet down," Mr. Figgins repeated to the nearly silent group of somber teens. "Students welcome to the Winter Pep Assembly. The Glee Club was originally supposed to perform, but after the sexually-charged riot of teenagers running thought the parking lot that occurred at the Fall assembly; the Christians for Youth Behavior Improvement petition the parents of 50 students stating that that suggestive dance moves are not acceptable for a viewing audience without a Parental Advisory projected on a screen. And since the only screen large enough to project such a warning to you as students belongs to the Cheerios and Coach Sylvester refuses to share any of their equipment with _any_ other members of the McKinley Community, the Glee Club will not be shocking once again with a suggestive surprise this time." The student body gathered in the gym groans in unison to which Sue scorers and the 12 members of New Directions. "Also, there have been reports that the monkey flu that inhabited several members of the William McKinley Community this fall is back on campus. So, please students, wash your hands vigorously and often. Anyway, here is Coach Beiste to discuss the Football team's rise to success."

Shannon Beiste takes the microphone from Coach and starts to talk about how proud she is of the team and thanks the school for supporting them, but Finn isn't paying attention. He's just starring at Rachel.

_Rachel is wearing a __**Cheerios uniform**__; sitting next to Santana, Brittany, and Quinn. It seems incorrect. Wrong. Like Rachel was the card that you would guess didn't belong. I really hated that she's sitting there. With them. Dressed like that. But, I can't say anything about it. I'm her boyfriend anymore and I don't get a say in what she does. Nor do I have a right to express my opinion. But I do have intuition. (Yeah, I think intuition is the word.) And it's a gift that has often helped me more than logic or studying ever did, and I __**know**__ that something about this situation is wrong and it's going to end badly. And not just badly for Rachel or me, but for the whole Club, and this feeling inside is terrifying the crap out of me. Especially since Rachel has no reason to believe me anymore. _

"And finally, your starting quarterback, Finn Hudson!" Snapped out of his daze, Finn looks over at the rest of the teams standing and clapping at him. He slowly rises and waves at humbly after Coach Beiste's introduction. "Ladies and Gentlemen the McKinley High Conference Finalist Football Team!" Shannon finishes and the adolescents stand and cheer as the football team awkwardly waves in thanks.

Mr. Figgins gets back on the mic. "Settle down, Children. Settle down," he requests once again in a monotone voice. "And now, a special performance by the 7-Time National Campion William McKinley Cheerios!"

Finn glared as the Cheerios, including Rachel Berry, performed their comprehensive routine. Rachel did a few perfect tumbling passes and even Finn was impressed. He remembered one time Rachel telling him that she took gymnastics as a kid, but he didn't realize that she was so good at it.

_

* * *

_

_The Football Game was exciting. I had been a good girlfriend while Finn and I had been dating and often went to his games. It was the least I could do since he went to every community theater play I wanted to see this summer. And he even did so with his perfect smile on his face. Now standing on the sidelines was a whole new experience though. Every time I heard their helmets clashing together I couldn't help but think they were getting hurt. But then I was explained that it was just part of the game._

In the middle of the third quarter Finn took a hit that plowed him into the ground. Rachel heart stopped as the he lied there. All she could think of was Sean and what had happened to him. After a few minutes he rose and slowly walked to over to the benches. He was fine; it was just a hard hit. Either way, the athletic trainers and The Beiste felt that he should sit out for the rest of the quarter. Which meant Sam should go in and he hasn't played consistently since the first month of school. So after the two interception passes, everyone was ill-at-ease. And even though Finn was able to go back in for the fourth, it didn't matter. The damage was done. And McKinley was out of the playoffs.

A loud groan of collective disappointment filled the stadium as the Lima community saw the defeat rapidly occur. When the last play was finished the supporters of the other team stampeded the field and the people in the McKinley stands gathered their belongings to get out of the parking lot as quickly as possible. Noah Puckerman literally ran into the boy's locker room. Most assumed that he needed to pee. In actuality he thought that if he ran off the field fast enough people would forget he was on them team. Unfortunate for him, he still owned a letterman jacket.

Rachel and the other Cheerios did some cool down stretches as the crowd started to clear out and the football team headed to the lockers. The weight of the loss slowing them down. Rachel finished up her stretches and zips up her duffel with her items from the game. Putting on her Cheerio's jacket, Finn walked up to her and took a seat beside her on the bench. Perspiring and defeated; his helmet hanging in his fingers.

"Hey," he started. He came here to say what he needed to, but the words wouldn't come out yet.

"Hey," Rachel repeated.

"Why are you doing this?" Finn asked solemnly; wanting to get the blunt question out there.

"Doing what?" she questioned back.

"This." He replies, gesturing to up and down her body. "It's not you," he finishes.

"Excuse me," she says annoyed.

"Look," Finn cuts her off. "I know I don't have any right to comment on your life choices anymore, but I think this is a bad idea." Rachel looks up at Finn with doe eyes, encouraging him to continue. "I know you pretty well and this isn't you. And I just… I just hope you're not doing this because of me, because I really wouldn't want that. You are an amazing person Rachel. And you're not one of these girls. You're so much better than them. You're confidant and beautiful and wonderful. You know that right? You are so, so much better than them."

Finn's voice is low and clear as he makes his feelings know about Rachel's new extracurricular activity. She digests his words and conjures up a response. "Finn, I understand and appreciate your concern, but, I'm okay. I'll be honest, you were one of the reasons why I decided to do this, but I'm actually really enjoying being a Cheerio." Rachel replies cheerfully. "Surprisingly, it's something I'm good at," she eyebrows, "and I really like the whole concept of being part of a team. But in a different way than being in Glee Club. I think I finally understand why you like being on the football team so much. The adrenaline rush of being an athlete is quite addicting," she explains matter-of-factly.

Finn smiles; glad that the Cheerios have not taken away the Rachel-goodness inside. "Well, I'm glad you like it. And I'm glad that you are still **you** and not morphing into one of those Sue Sylvester robots. Trust me. Those girls can be scary."

Rachel smiles. "Thanks, Finn," she moves in for a hug – a friendly hug – and he accepts. Even though he's sweaty and gross, he still smells like Finn, and she stills smells like Rachel, and they both breathe in the familiar scents.

Then as they pull apart, they realize – they _both_ realize – that they had a conversation. A real conversation without the animosity and heartache of recent. That they were both moving on. It was refreshing for both of them. "Goodnight, Rachel," Finn remarks with his dimpled half-grin as he rises from his seat.

"Goodnight, Finn," she repeats and Finn walks off to the lockers by himself.

Rachel watches as Finn leaves and she knows that she misses him. She misses him a lot. Too much, really. But the fact that they're speaking – the fact that they're slowly getting back to the friendship that was once there – means the world to her.

* * *

Throwing her cheer duffel over her shoulder and getting up to leave, Rachel sees Puck approaching her; freshly laundered. He was one of the first to the locker room, looking deeply depressed because of the loss, and therefore one of the first out. She has no idea why he's coming her way, but she assumes that it has something to do with Judaism. "Hey, Rach," Puck starts with that voice, the perfect blend of Charmer and Pervert, that for some reason is like a high-polarity magnet to most women.

"Hell, Noah," Rachel responds, with her head held high and her back straight; trying to stand as tall as possible. Strong. Like a good Cheerio should be.

"You know he still cares about you," he smirks.

"I would like to hope so," she responds with a sigh.

"And you definitely got his attention with this new you. As well as the attention of several other men on this campus," Puck explains. "Not as much as the time you dressed like Britney Spears… but close."

Rachel couldn't help it, Puck was being charismatic, and she was blushing thusly. "Well, I'll take that as a complement," she flirts.

"Well, how about you join me at Breadstix tonight. It's not like you have a boyfriend to worry about. And I'll call up and put our names on the list now, so that when we get there we don't have to wait awkwardly for one of those light-up vibrating disks to announce our table."

Rachel's smile grew wider at Puck's invitation. And he was right; she didn't have a boyfriend anymore. If she wanted to go out, there really was nothing stopping her. "C'mon. I promise we'll be going out just as friends," Puck cooed, moving a few steps closer. His face mere inches away from hers.

Rachel nodded, "Fine. I'll go."

"Excellent," he said, holding out his shoulder for Rachel to grab on. Rachel happily obliged as he lead them off the field and towards the parking lot. "Hey Rachel, I do have one question though. Do you like wine coolers?"

"I don't know. I've never tried."

"Well, we'll be sure to try tonight!"

* * *

**A/N:** Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed it. And even if you didn't, please review and let me know your feelings towards it so far. It's a great motivator. Also, I usually don't put lyrics of the song I have the Glee Club singing because I know I scroll over lyrics when I'm reading the Glee fics. Anyway, **there will be a few pivotal songs coming up, so PLEASE ANSWER: would you rather have lyrics or have me just tell you the song and you can look it up online?** Please let me know because I need to know by the next chapter. Thanks again!


	3. Chapter 3

**Authors Note:** Thanks so much for the review and the alerts! Sorry it took so long for a new update. I got horribly ill with this terrible virus and it's made me a little sluggish. But there is a lot of plot in this chapter. The song Finn sings in is "Love Hurts" by Incubus. It you haven't heard it, You Tube it! I think it's a great fit for Cory Monteith's voice. If you haven't seen _The Wedding Singer_ version of 'Love Stinks", you might want to You Tube that too. Enjoy!

**Disclaimer:** Ryan Murphy you should really put _Glee_ up to be publicly traded. It would be better for you and your fans in the long run.

* * *

Sitting in the Choir room on Monday morning, there was a thick layer of discomfort as Rachel glanced over at Puck sitting precisely four people away. Moving her glance up one riser to Finn slouching in his seat, Rachel knew that everything would be different. That it already was.

Mr. Schuester writes the word 'Love' up on the dry-erase board and encircles it with a heart as he starts his lesson. "It's February 7th, which means in 7 days it will be the 14th. St. Valentine's Day. And although it could easily be argued and proven that V-Day is merely a mediocre attempt for advertisers, Hallmark, and Russell-Stover to make some money before Easter, the fact that Valentine's Day is about love is a very important aspect for those of us in this room. Love is THE most discussed and proclaimed topic in music. Millions of songs have been about love. Written for loved ones. Or declarations of love lost. Your assignment this week is to perform a song about love. Each of you – individually. It doesn't have to be about romantic love or sexy love. It could be about heartache or disapproval of love. Or even how Love… Stinks!"

The first few chords of J. Giles Band hit start to fill the room, the majority of the club starts to cheer, but Finn is not one of them.

"C'mon Table Nine Mutants, are you joining me?" Will asks. The lot rises and starts to sing and dance along.

_Okay, that __**was**__ funny, especially since _The Wedding Singer_ is definitely Sandler's best film next to _Happy Gilmore_. I don't even want to think about the waste of money _Grown-Ups_ was. Well, not a complete waste there were those two hot chicks and Selma Hayek in that movie, but anyway, I'm totally not feeling this assignment. I mean, yeah, this song is funny and I finally got up the courage to join the others because I don't want to seem like I'm not a team player, but to be completely honest, it feels like Mr. Schue is just doing this to hurt me. He knows that me and Rachel are broken up and that I'm having a hard time dealing with the fact that yet another girlfriend cheated on me, but now he wants me to sing a song about love? Is he serious? And Rachel; the one time her big mouth would have really come into use and she doesn't even say anything. She just sits there staring up Mr. S while he gives his lecture and doesn't bother to question how it might make some of us feel? She just sits there with her pony-tail up tight. Why did she choose this week to become a perfect, studious Cheerio? God, look at her. Even that uniform, which I still think does seem right, she looks beautiful. She really is, ya know? Her body's always been smokin' but now that's she's a Cheerio other guys are noticing that as well, and it bothers me. I don't like it. It was as though that was my little secret. And she's a good kisser too. Her full lips definitely come in handy. And all that talking has taught her tongue some tricks. I miss her mouth. I miss her kisses. I miss her and now I have to do this assignment and be reminded more about how much being broken-hearted sucks. Love does stink, damn it. _

_

* * *

_

Hey," Rachel started as she walked out the door of the choir room with Finn beside her. She was hoping their conversation on the football field a few nights before led to some progress in going back to being friends.

"Hey..." Finn murmured back. The conversation was not as helpful as Rachel thought.

"How was your weekend?" She was desperately trying to make small talk.

"Fine. I was still a little sore from the hit I took at the game, so I just relaxed and played X-Box."

"Oh, okay." She was very quiet in her response.

"Kurt stopped by for dinner on Saturday night."

"Really? How is he?" Rachel was excited to hear about Kurt. The whole club missed him more than they will admit.

"Fine," Finn grumbled.

"Well tell him I miss him and I hope he stops by to visit sometime when Karovsky's out sick."

Finn smiled at that little remark. He could tell that Rachel wanted to discuss more, but he wasn't sure if he wanted to. Or if he even had anything worth discussing with her. "How was your weekend?" He asked trying to be polite; she at least deserved that.

"It was fine. Nothing new or interesting to report," Rachel replied at a high pitch, sounding like she actually did have something very interesting to talk about.

"Okay... Well, bye..." Finn remarked skeptically as he walked past her locker down the hall to his own. Just as he was turning the combination lock, a red-nosed Jacob Ben Israel started to slowly saunter down in Finn's direction. Jacob was the newest victim to horrible virus that was now overtaking McKinley for the second time this school year. Right when Finn turned to take off his knapsack, Jacob sneezed so strong, Rachel was convinced the building shook. Jacob's main target was Finn. Finn was disgusted and groaned as Jacob continued to carry down the hall.

"Sorry, Bro," Jacob semi-apologized to the taller boy as he kept walking by. "Ew." Rachel commented out loud to herself from her locker a short distance away. She decided she would rather take a slushy facial over that horrific display any day. That was just another sickening experience Rachel had partaken in during the past 72 hours.

* * *

Rachel looked over to Puck as he shoved down his massive cheeseburger; completely revolted. His 'midnight snack' was dripping grease all over his gray t-shirt. The blanket was up to her chest, covering her body. Not that it mattered. She was still wearing her bra; she never took it off.

"I thought I would feel different afterward," Rachel says looking over to Noah; mid-bite. She quickly moves her head back to the forward facing position, desperate to look away.

"Yeah, well I've noticed that it takes about 20-or-so times for the feeling of accomplishment to kick in," Puck wisely says back. Looking over to Rachel's distraught demeanor, as she stares at the wall straight ahead of her, "How do you feel?" he asks.

"I don't feel anything. 'Cause it didn't mean anything." Rachel replies, not looking towards him.

"C'mon, it's getting late," Puck comments before belching loudly. "I'll take you home."

* * *

'Love Songs…' Rachel types into her web browser lying in her bed, letting out a heavy sigh. She closes her laptop and pushes it away on the other side of the mattress.

_This should be gravy for me. Rachel Berry and Love Songs go hand-in-hand. But lately it I haven't really felt like singing about love. Good or bad. And now, after what happened, it just doesn't feel appropriate. Mr. Schuester is always out to get me and I guess this assignment is no different. But I guess I deserve it after what I did. __I really didn't mean to hurt him. I DIDN'T! Did I have a right to be upset because he lied? Yes. But, it doesn't matter now. When 'it' would happen, I always pictured myself having his wonderful romantic evening with candles and beautiful music in the background. And Finn would just hold me all night long. Sometimes when I pictured this, he even made me vegan pancakes for breakfast. The fact of the matter is that after I met Finn, and we became as close as we were, I knew that my first experience of that should be shared with him. And that can't happen now. For either of us. And it sucks. And it hurts._

* * *

Finn felt lightheaded as he headed into Glee rehearsal on Thursday afternoon, he really wasn't feeling well. And this 'Love' assignment was really pissing him off. Finn knew right away what song he wanted to sing, but that doesn't make it any easier. Especially since Rachel is already there and he said in yesterday's class that he would present this afternoon. On top of that, being sick really sucks and he only seems to be getting worse.

Standing up at the front of the room, Finn can feel the room's eyes stabbing him like daggers to the skin as the opening guitar riffs start to play. Finn plays the powerful drum introduction then starts to sing. The drum set sat before him like protective armor as he sang and played along with the band. He didn't feel the need to get up and move around the room. Plus, he was a little dizzy from his headache. By the time Finn got to the chorus, seeing the pained expression on Rachel's face only made things more painful.

_Sometimes when I'm alone I wonder_

_Is there spell that I am under?_

_Keeping me from seeing the real thing_

_Love hurts_

_But sometimes it's a good hurt_

_And it feels like I'm alive_

_Love sings_

_When it transcends the bad things_

_Have a heart and try me_

_Cause without love I won't survive_

Finn sang with beautiful angst, and as the song ended he gently closed his eyes – fighting back the pain he felt and the tears that formed – when the group quietly clapped. Trying to graciously nod, "Achooo!" was the only noise that came out of his mouth as Finn sneezed.

The room said 'Bless You' in return and Quinn walked over to Finn with a slightly grossed-out expression as she put squeezed some hand sanitizer into his palm.

"Thank-you," Finn said to Quinn with glassed over eyes.

"Are you okay?" Mr. Schuester asks Finn as sneezes for a second time.

"Uh…I think I am," Finn replied sounding stuffy and groggy.

"I think maybe you should go to the nurse," Will recommends.

"Okay…" Finn agrees as he walks though the choir room heading towards the door, picking up his book bag on the way out. Rachel flashes him a smile as he walks out slowly. Artie sings his 'love' song, making Brittany blush and rehearsal ends early that day. Everyone feeling the inevitable tire that comes with the cold winter weather.

* * *

By Friday, half the school was sick. Holly Holiday was filling in for three different teachers and the average attendance for most classes dwindling down by the second. The Monkey Flu had taken over. And the styrene of germs migrating though William McKinley for the second time this academic year was much more powerful this cycle. And since Principle Figgins had taken early precautions to prevent getting infected again; he was still kicking. Making McKinley High a place about equal treatment of students, and fairness, and blah, blah, blah… The fact of the matter was this was making Sue Sylvester prickly. Sue was hoping that by knocking Figgins out of power once again, she would finally gain enough clout for a coup d'état to overturn McKinley, exile The Beiste, and get Shuester's Brillo pad out of her sight. That did not seem the case this go around.

_Standing in Cheerio's practice yesterday, I noticed something Journal. My best tumbler, and newest addition to my squad, Rachel Berry – who is also a member of the __**glee club**__ – was off-center in not one, but TWO of her tumbling passes. Then she yawned before staring the pyramid formation. It's making me nervous, Journal. I think I even saw a quiver… _

"Becky Jackson!" Sue loudly projects, summoning her minion to her office.

"Yes, Coach?" Becky dutifully answers; pushed up her glasses resting on her nose.

"I need you to keep a tail on Rachel Berry. Follow her around campus. On her way home after practice a few times. Don't do it every day or she'll catch on, but just keep an eye on her. I will be doing a same. If you see anything unusual, inform me immediately. I want a detailed report in two weeks." Sue finishes rattling off her assignment by handing Becky a clipboard.

"Right on it, Coach!" Becky responds, giving Ms. Sylvester a salute before marching out.

* * *

It was Monday. Judgment Day. Valentine's Day. And Rachel Berry had nothin'. She's never, _ever_ been unprepared for Glee Club and she really had nothing to present at class today. At least she was lucky enough that Finn was still out because of the flu.

Closing her locker after getting her books for first period, Rachel found herself being yanked by Tina down the hall. Mercedes, Quinn, and Lauren in tow. "Ow!" Rachel complained as she tried to pry Tina's grip.

Once inside the Girls Restroom; a wide-eyed, giddy Tina began to speak. "I… I… Ahhh!...," Tina takes another deep breath and then begins. "Mike and I totally had sex on Saturday night!" Tina said with gusto. A toothy grin on her face and bounce with her last word.

"AHHH!" The girls replied in unison.

Sam was walking down the hall with Artie as they heard the uproarious cry from the Ladies Room. They stopped, startled, and shared a questioning glance.

"_Twice!_" Tina said in an excited whisper, the others on their toes.

"AHHH!" The girls replied in unison once more.

Hearing the second excited scream, Sam and Artie stopped short once again with the loud noise.

"And girls say we're the weird ones…" Sam comments as he starts to push Artie down the hall.

"Preach," the spectacled companion concurred.

Back in the bathroom, the ladies of the glee club begged like dogs to hear more of the story. "See, my parents were very, very stupid because they decided to go away the weekend before Valentine's Day. Leaving their 17-year-old daughter, with a very handsome boyfriend, alone with a whole, big house all to herself.

"Stupid," Lauren commented.

"Stupid," Tina repeated, before she continued. "It was amazing. He came over and I wasn't even expecting it. I mean, I had hoped… but I never thought it would be as amazing as it was. Mike was so gracious and respectful. And romantic music was playing. And he held me all night while we slept. Then the following morning… he even made me pancakes. And on top of being a very nimble dancer, Mike Chang can even flip pancakes in the air!"

At this point, all the girls in the room were swooning listening to Tina's story – clenching their braided fists to their chests. "Good for you girl!" Mercedes chimed in as the others shared wide smiles. Happy and excited for the milestone in their friend's life.

"I'm surprise you're happy about this, Abstinence Queen," Lauren said to Quinn.

"Well, just because I personally abstain from sex, doesn't mean I can't be happy about a friend's sensational experience," Quinn replied to Lauren's remark with a devilish grin.

"It was pretty sensational… I mean, I knew he had done it before, he was honest to me about that," Tina continued, causing Rachel to take in a sharp breath. "Sorry…" Tina said with regret at her last remark, trying to be cautious of Rachel's feelings.

"No, it's okay." Rachel clarified, getting the room's attention. "Continue. I want to hear more. I'm so happy for you!" she finished. She wasn't lying. Rachel was happy for Tina. So happy she was envious. Tina's night was exactly what Rachel had wanted too.

"Well, I knew he had done it before. _With Brittany_, but for some reason, when it was happening, it didn't matter. I know that Mike loves me and respects me, and that's all that really matters. Plus… his abs… And his arms…" Tina moons. "Yum…"

* * *

Quinn, Lauren, Rachel, and Mercedes all had warm, daydreaming smiles on their faces as Tina talked. Pleased for her. Thrilled for her. And all the girls not-so-subtly watched as Mike Chang entered the Choir room to sit next to Tina in glee rehearsal later that afternoon. When Mike put his arm around Tina's shoulders and Tina leaned into his chest, all the girls shared a wicked grin as the class was about to start.

"I'm getting a weird vibe in here today," Mike mumbled to Tina right before Mr. Schuester began his lesson.

"Yeah, but it's a good weird," Tina concurred back.

Rachel was sitting in the front row, in the chair at the end. She was nervous and her body was stiff, although she did smirk at Mike's remark; along with the other girls. Mr. Schuester stood in the front of the room, getting the students attention as he started to conduct his lesson for the week ahead.

"Okay, before we get started on our new project to gear up for Regionals, Rachel still has to perform Love Song for Valentine's Day. When your read, Rachel" Will gestures towards Rachel, walking up to her.

"I don't have a song prepared. I'm not doing the assignment," Rachel says with a small voice; her eyes looking down at her fingertips playing with the open pleats of her cheer skirt.

"Rachel, you are aware that glee now counts as a class with credit and you will get an 'F' for this assignment if you don't participate," Mr. Schue replied with soft determination, looking down at Rachel with distain, making it clear this might be a bad choice.

"I'm aware, but I'm also aware that this is a free country, and I have rights, and you can't force me to do anything I choose not to. I'm not comfortable with doing this assignment and I would rather take the dip in my grades than perform something that makes me feel ill-at-ease." Rachel responded quietly, but with self-assurance.  
_  
"Jesus!_" Santana snaps from the back row, up high on the risers. "He's not even here today!" She bitches in her snarky voice.

Rachel snaps her head back at Santana's comment, but then turns back forward when Mr. Schuester begins to reprimand her. "You know, Rachel, I'm really disappointed. Just because you're sad right now doesn't mean you can't do an assignment. You don't have to a song about being in love, it can be anything related to love, as we discussed in class. You are one of the leaders of this club and you're letting us down."

Rachel felt like a sad puppy after an accident in the house, and she opened her mouth to protest, but before she could speak, she was cut off—

"This is crap!" Santana hollered from her seat; causing Rachel to look up over her shoulder once again. "I am so sick of you thinking that the Glee Club needs your talent and that you're so special. You're not."

"And you're _not_ the only one who can hit a high note," Mercedes chimed in; adding fuel to fire.

"To make something clear, Midget, just because you're wearing that uniform does not make me your friend. If you're a freak, you are _always_ a freak, despite the Cheerios uniform or not!"

"Guys... calm down," Puck spoke-up. Knowing that one of the reasons Rachel might not have wanted to sing was because of him.

"No!" the Latina barked, her voice echoing with the acoustics. "It's about time she learns that no one here likes her. Boo-Hoo. You're boyfriend didn't break-up with you because you kissed another guy. He broke-up with you because you're a self-centered brat!"

"Like you're much better, Santana!" Quinn interjected, but it was too late.

Rachel opened her mouth to rebuttal, but she couldn't think of anything to say. Looking around at the group as Santana caught her breath, Rachel started to feel queasy. The room felt like it was suffocating and spinner her at the same time. She needed to get out of there. Taking one last look at Mr. Schue before reaching the door, Rachel walked out. But it wasn't her typical, indigent storm-out – she left defeated; beaten and broken.

"That was disgusting," Quinn said with disgust as she glared down Santana, acting like the head cheerleader she was.

"You know, I am let down that Rachel didn't participate, Santana, but I'm more disappointed in your current rant," Mr. Schue commented.

Puck sat at the opposite side of the row as Rachel and looked down at his feet. He knew this was just the tip of the iceberg of something bad and he was just waiting for the cruse liner to collide.

* * *

She still felt like she was spinning as Rachel headed down the hall towards the ladies room. There were tears in her eyes and Rachel was unsure if they were from the recent bashing of her entire lifestyle or from her queasiness. Either way, Rachel was balling as she rushed into the closest stall and started to vomit. Feeling even more lightheaded. The feeling was making her nervous. Was she the next victim of the Money Flu? After the second round of regurgitation, Rachel flushed and slid her back against the side of stall until her bottom hit the tile floor. It was then when Rachel realized what _wasn't_ happening right now. Something she _needed_ to be happening right now. It was the middle of the month. And, therefore it should be her 'time' of the month. Only… it wasn't…

* * *

**A/N:** Thank you so, so much for reading. Do you hate me? I hope you liked it. Please review and let me know what you thought. Good? Bad? Indifferent? I want to know. The story is actually getting close to the end and I'm hoping to finish before the Super Bowl episode, and reviews always inspire me. Thanks again!


	4. Chapter 4

**Authors Note:** Thank-you so, so much for the reviews and the alerts! I'm glad a lot of you were being critical. And comment to a writer can be helpful feedback, so please continue to do so. Oh, and for this chapter… note the rating. And the title.

**Disclaimer:** Ryan Murphy you should really put _Glee_ up to be publicly traded. It would be better for you and your fans in the long run.

* * *

Standing there, looking down at the plastic, she was determined to make it not true. That it had to be wrong. She didn't cry. She wasn't upset. Just confused. That couldn't be right? Could it? Five times? A sixth had to say something different, right?

It didn't…

* * *

Carole Hummel came home from work and went into her son's room to check on his status of life. When he was still regurgitating uncontrollably as she left this morning, she was nervous to go. The maternal instincts inside of her tugging at her heart. But then Carole remember that her son is no longer a little boy and he can take care of himself for eight hours; even when deathly ill. As she opened the door to Finn Hudson snoring with his Xbox controller still in his hand, she wasn't too worried.

Walking up to the Hummel-Hudson household that afternoon, Rachel had to physically bite her bottom lip until it hurt to stop her crying. The technique wasn't working well. Hearing the _ding-dang-dong_ after pressing the doorbell, she prayed that Finn was _not_ the one opening the door. When Carole Hummel's smiling friendly face greeted her, Rachel sighed in relief. "Hello Mrs. Hummel, is Finn here?"

"Yes, but he's comatose and will probably will be in that state for the next few hours," Carole said in a mothering tone. "You can come back later if you like," she suggested.

"Well, actually, I'm glad he's asleep because I came over to speak to you. In private," Rachel explained.

Carole understood that Rachel was constantly searching for a motherly influence; this moment no exception. "Sure. Come in," Carole replied, opening the door wide for Rachel to enter. "I didn't know you were a cheerleader," she said, making small talk.

"Oh, yeah," Rachel concurred looking down at her uniform, "I just joined. I was enjoying it at first, but now I'm not so sure."

Once inside the home, Carole lead Rachel into the living room as the ladies sat on opposite sides of the couch. Carole previously only had encounters with the boisterous, confidant Rachel who was dating her son. The young lady sitting beside her was not that woman at all. She had been changed. Altered. Uniform or not.

_I needed to talk to someone. A woman. And she was the only person I could talk to and trust. Shelby was definitely out the question. The girls from Glee and the Cheerios were only going to start gossip. Quinn was back to Queen Bee and wouldn't care if I were in the same state she was a year ago. Carole was my only hope._

"Are you okay, Rachel?" Carole asked with concern. Rachel looked up at the older woman with wide, sad, searching eyes and it became **very clear** why Rachel was there to talk to Carole. That Rachel was _'in trouble'_. She was trembling; tears falling freely.

"I'm so _sorry_…" she croaked out, collapsing into Carole Hummel's chest. Carole wrapped her arms around the shaking creature, calming herself down as well. Rachel popped her head up and proclaimed, "It's not Finn's." She was surprisingly stern and clear when she spoke. "I promise," she said trying to make Carole believe her.

Carole was uncertain to trust the young lady as Rachel fell back into Carole's embrace, a new river of tears flowing. "Rachel, if it's not Finn's than who's…"

Carole trailed off as Rachel looks up at the older woman with doe eyes; knowing that Carole could answer her own question.

"_I'm __**so**__ sorry_," The younger woman repeated, falling once again into her helpless position, needing Mrs. Hummel's loving hold as a glue to keep her from coming apart.

"It's okay," Carole comforted, knowing Rachel truly had nowhere else to go. "It's going to be okay. It will all work out."

"I don't want 'it to all work out.' I want it to end," Rachel murmured poignantly, raising her head once again. "Now," anger in her voice with her last word.

Carole was quiet as she processed Rachel's statement. Understanding how she felt and knowing she needed someone to help her. Carole knew Rachel had no one to turn to. "Okay. We can figure that out too," Carole said calmly.

Carole let Rachel cry and tremble in her arms for a while until there was nothing left. Carole had, thankfully, never been in this situation, but she knew several who were. She felt for each and every one of them. She knew she had to help Rachel because Rachel was a good girl. A good person. Yes, she was a little self-involved, but she wasn't mean or malicious like most of the other girls Carole had met from William McKinley.

Carole knew that Rachel didn't have anyone to go to about this. Finn had told Carole about what happened with Rachel finding her mom. That came out the night when Finn explained everything that had happened in The Basement between him, Burt, and Kurt. Subsequently Finn spilled about everything that had happened that spring in one long confused, upset rant. Carole appreciated that she was the kind of mom kids though they could talk to. Finn and Rachel being perfect examples.

Rachel had finally caught her breath and asked like a 5-year-old, "Can I have a glass of water?"

"Sure," Carole replied with a crooked smile. Once she returned and sat back down, Carole waited until Rachel completed several gulps from the glass before going further with the conversation. "I'm gonna have to tell your dads. They are going to have to consent," Carole said trying to be reasonable. "You don't have to be there when I tell them, but I have to. I'm gonna call and get you the soonest appointment to get this… taken care of…" Carole trailed off.

Finishing what little was left in her cup; Rachel once again pressed her body against Carole and wrapped her arms around her. The empty glass pressing into Carole's back. "_I'm so sorry_," Rachel said for the umpteenth time.

"Shhh. It will be okay," Carole cooed, rubbing Rachel's back. Once Rachel was sniffling, Carole asked, "What time do your dads get home?"

"About 30 minutes," Rachel guestimated.

"Okay. I'll make some phone calls and get this straightened out. Then we'll get you home, Okay?"

"Okay…" Rachel murmured like a toddler. Helpless in the world.

* * *

Carole and Rachel entered the Berry residence to darkness. Her dad's weren't home yet.

"I'm really tired," Rachel remarked as the woman headed into the foyer.

"Well you're upset. C'mon let's get you to bed," Carole said ushering her up the stairs.

Carole waited while Rachel changed into her pajamas and collapsed into her bed, rubbing her hair while she fell asleep. Once her fathers arrived 10 minutes later, Carole calmly explained the situation and that Rachel needed their consent according before she could undergo the procedure. As active and very vocal members of the American Civil Liberties Union, Rachel's dads gave their permission so they weren't hypocrites, but they would be lying if they were less-than-pleased. They always thought they raised Rachel to make better choices. Either way, when Rachel walked down the stairs the following day – in her pink jeans and matching pink and white stripped polo – they gave their daughter long hugs and bid her farewell. Both of them knowing this was the hardest decision Rachel had ever made.

* * *

Walking into McKinley High that morning, Rachel Berry felt different. She didn't feel confidant like the day walked in wearing her new Cheerio's uniform. She didn't feel sexy like the day she dressed like Britney Spears. She didn't feel ecstatic like that day after Sectionals Sophomore year. She didn't feel special like when she walked in with Finn on the first day of school. She didn't feel terrified like she did the day after her first slushy facial. And she didn't feel sad like she did when she found out Finn slept with Santana. She just felt different. Older? No. Confidant? Certainly not. Just different.

Hung on the hanger that Coach Sylvester gave her when handing over the uniform, Rachel held out the perfectly pressed garment and opened the door to Sue's office.

"Coach Sylvester," Rachel knocked as she entered.

"Oh, yes, Rachel. Take a seat," Sue said just creepy enough that she wouldn't be committed, but still terrified all who crossed her path.

"Hi Ms. Sylvester. I'm here to give this back to you," Rachel says with slight regret.

"Are you quitting the Cheerios?" Sue questioned with distain. "People don't just quit the Cheerios. I am the one who dismisses the unworthy."

"Yes, I'm leaving. It's been a wonderful experience," Rachel started to explain, trying to fight back the tears that came along with why she was conceding her Cheerleader status. "I had some great times, but I don't think Cheer is for me. You have been a great coach and I learned a lot, but I can't do this anymore. It's not me and I'm sorry," she finished. Leaving the uniform sprawled out on Sue's desk; Rachel quickly got up and headed out the door.

Coach Sylvester marched to the office door and flung it open as she watched Rachel Berry walk into her next class as the bell rang; books clenched to her chest.

"Becky Jackson!" Sue called out, seeking the attention of her minion.

"Yes, Coach?" Becky replied with attentiveness.

"I need an update on our Rachel Berry project. What has she been up to?" Sue questioned with inquisitive disgust.

"I was shadowing her yesterday, Coach," Becky begins to explain. "At precisely 5:16pm, I spotted Rachel Berry walking out of Finn Hudson's house with his mother Carole." Becky has her head facing down to a yellow legal pad as she read off her notes.

"Go on," Sue begged for more.

"She looked very upset as she left and Mrs. Hummel seemed to be comforting her. She was rubbing her shoulder as they walked to the car and Mrs. Hummel drove Rachel home."

"Interesting…" Sue snarled. "Humm. I will have to look more into this. Very good work, Becky."

"Thanks, Coach," Becky saluted, before leaving the room quickly. Sue knew something was brewing and she could smell the pot staring to fill up with scolding liquid. Rachel Berry was trying to keep something for Sue Sylvester. Big mistake.

* * *

Before the day was through, Rachel knew the hardest part was still ahead of her. It was physically hurting her to think about what she was about to do. Or maybe that was the zygote multiplying inside of her. She wasn't sure. But, Rachel knew she had to get this done before she left today. Carole was picking her up for her appointment soon. Plus Rachel knew she wanted to get this done now before the group met for the day.

"Mr. Schuester?" Rachel chirped, trying to get the curly-haired teacher's attention; knocking gently on the open door.

"Oh, hey Rachel! Come on in." Mr. Schue said, gesturing to the seat in front of his desk. "I see you're not wearing your Cheerio's uniform today."

"Yeah, well, I decided that wasn't for me." Rachel said with a cross between a grimes and smile expressed on her lips.

"Oh, well I'm sorry to hear that. But to be honest, I didn't think that was for you."

"It wasn't" Rachel concurred. She knew it was now or never and she needed to get to the point. "Look, Mr. Schuester, you're not going to believe me when I say what I'm about to say, but you must understand that I'm being completely serious."

"Okay…" Will replied, slightly nervous.

"I'm quitting Glee," she said in an even tone. She wasn't regretful or overjoyed. Just stating what was happening.

Mr. Schuester let out a laugh. "Ha!" he giggled refusing to understand.

"Mr. Schuester, I'm being serious. I've decided to leave Glee. After yesterday, the club made it clear that they didn't want me there anymore and it's obvious to even me that you don't need my talent anymore. You guys are going to go to Nationals in New York and kick ass, but you don't need me to do it anymore." Rachel tried to plead her case as well as possible, but it was clear that Will wasn't having it.

"Rachel, you can't obviously be serious?" Will questioned.

"Look, Mr. Schuester, as much as I choose to be ignorant to the opinions my peers have of me, I know that my presence is no longer a good thing for the club." Rachel was tearing up as she continued, "Please don't make this harder for me than it already is. I know that my existence in glee is tearing the club apart, so consider this 'taking one for the team' and please try to understand."

"Rachel, this is absurd. Santana is just an insecure teenage girl. Don't let her catty comments upset you," Will pleaded.

Rachel and Will were both startled when Rachel's phone, resting in the palms of her hand started to ring and vibrate. When she saw the text from Carole stating she was in front of the main entrance. "Mr. Schuester, I can't keep wasting my time with Glee. It hurts too much." She had cracked, the tears spilled from her eyes without control. She was shaking too; the nerves finally coming out. "And Finn is there and I just can't do it anymore. I'm sorry, I really have to go," Rachel squeaked out before running out of Will's office and into the hallway.

She couldn't use the Choir Room entrance from his office anymore. Will watched as Rachel quickly grabbed her coat from her locker and ran out to Finn's mother's car; hair swaying to and fro as she hurried and ran.

Will saw Rachel quickly collapse into Mrs. Hummel's car and slammed it shut as mid-Winter rain started to fall. Will could feel's Sue's presence as she walked down the hall several paces behind him. As they watched the short student pull out of the parking lot, Sue and Will made devilish eye contact before going back to work. Both knew something was going on. Something big. One teacher trying to protect Rachel. One teacher knowing she was ammunition.

* * *

**A/N:** Okay, so thank-you to all of you who kept reading till the end. There is a few more chapters left, but like I said this is a short story and I already have a good portion of the next chapter written, I just need to type it out. (Since I find myself inspired to write more on the train to and from work; writing in a notebook). Please review and let me know what you think good or bad. Do several of you want to throw fruit at me? Let me know what you think will happen next. Will Rachel pull a Joan Halloway? Who knows...?


	5. Chapter 5

**Authors Note:** Thanks for the reviews everyone. And for reading my story. I hope you like what's coming up next. The song Rachel is singing is "Me and the Moon" by Something Corporate. If you haven't heard it, You Tube it. It's a wonderful piece of music (and one of my personal favorites). And just a warning, this chapter is mainly dialogue. There are only a few short chapters left and I hope to have them up by the Super Bowl. Thanks again for reading.

**Disclaimer:** Ryan Murphy you should really put _Glee_ up to be publicly traded. It would be better for you and your fans in the long run.

* * *

Will walked into rehearsal feeling downtrodden after what had transpired a little while ago. How on Earth was he going to explain this? Especially since he didn't even know what was going on himself. The Lot of miss-matched teens glared as Will entered the choir room, Will ultimately decided to start the lesson for today as he was originally planning, as he wrote the word 'Regionals' on the board.

"Okay, guys, Regionals is fast approaching and if we want to get to Nationals we _literally_ have to be perfect. We have a lot of stiff competition between the Warblers and Vocal Adrenaline. And besides loosing Kurt we are also down one of our biggest assets."

"What? Finn?" Quinn questioned from the back row, sitting next to Sam. "His just out sick; he'll be back in a few days."

"I wasn't talking about Finn. Look around guys; don't you notice that someone is missing?" The group looked around not noticing the difference Will was talking about. "Rachel?" he questioned.

"Oh, yeah..." Lauren chimed in.

"Hold up." Artie said abruptly. "Are you saying that Rachel quit?"

Mr. Schuester frowned and shrugged.

"Good. We're better off without that whining twerp," Santana barked from the far side of the room.

"Ya know, Santana, its comments like that which are the reason Rachel left."

"Mr. Schue, you can't be serious?" Artie asks.

"No guys. She's gone. In fact with all the… varied… Rachel rants I've witnessed over the past year and a half, I can honestly say that I've never seen Rachel more upset. After she told me she was leaving, she ran out the school crying."

"But she didn't give any other reason other than bulling as to why she left?" Mercedes asks.

"Well, she did say that she didn't feel needed anymore… and the mumbled something about Finn, but at that point, she was already sobbing so hard that most of what she was saying uncomprehendable."

"So, what, did she like transfer schools?" Sam asks.

"I don't think so, but I would say that she needs a little time away from Glee and she made that clear," Mr. Schuester finishes, to confused looks by the group. "Guys we've lost members in the past, its okay. Moving on…Regionals is coming up fast, and I like I said we have to be perfect, we need to start being meticulous when working on routines we already have. We have a great body of songs we've already done that we've never gone further with. Your assignment for this week, taking a number that we've already performed and perfecting it. Critiquing it on how we can make it better."

With that class continues, but the whole room feels different. Finn's out sick, Kurt's far, far away, and Rachel's done. The ill-at-ease energy was nauseating to all.

* * *

When class ends, Puck walks up to Mr. Schuester wanting to know more about Rachel. They hadn't really talked – hell they hadn't really even acknowledged each other's presence – since they...ya know...

"Hey Mr. Schue, can I talk to you for a sec?" the mohawked boy asked.

"Yeah, what's up?" Will asked leading them into his office off the choir room; both taking seats in front of the desk.

"Did Rachel say anything else about why she quit. After what happened the other day in class and what happened at Sectionals, I just want...to make sure she's okay."

"Honestly Puck, I've never seen her so upset. It was obvious that she was upset about something else."

"Did she say what it was?" Puck's heart was starting to race.

"No. She just got up and ran out of the school. Rachel ran out crying and then Mrs. Hummel picked her up."

"Mrs. Hummel? As in Finn's mom?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Oh, nothing. I'm gonna go," Puck says as he rises from his seat.

"Hey Puck, if you can recruit another person, preferably one with a soprano voice, to join the club, that would be a great help," Mr. Schue asks with hope.

"I'll see what I can do," Puck replies walking off. All Puck really cared about was why Rachel ran into a car with Carole Hummel.

* * *

Finn Hudson finally felt well enough to go to school on Wednesday, but he still was a little queasy. Walking down the hall, he met up with Artie and Sam who were discussing something about 'reworking'.

"Reworking what?" Finn asked.

"The songs for Regionals," Sam replies as though it's obvious.

"Why?" Finn eyebrows.

"Since Rachel quit," Sam laments.

"WHAT?" Finn's eyes bugged out of his head hearing the news.

"Oh, I guess no one told you..." Artie murmurs, his eyes shifting from side to side.

"Why didn't anyone tell me? I own a phone. You could have called me!" Anger was in Finn's voice.

"Well I guess we all assumed that someone else would say something," Sam explains. No one wants to be the bearer of bad news.

"Plus, you were sick and we wanted you to get better," Artie retorts.

"By finding out that Rachel quit the club after the fact? Did she even say why?" Finn's blood was starting to boil, and he already was warmer that the usually 98.6.

"Well, Santana did kinda yell at her pretty aggressively on Monday…" Artie trails off.

Annoyed Finn grunts and throws his hands in the air before walking off.

_The first period bell hasn't even rung yet, and already, drama. And a mess I, once again, has to clean up. Because I'm a leader and that's my job. Blah, blah, blah. Ugh! Why can't for once someone help me? Or at least take the lead in a situation? Is that really that much to ask?_

Finn heads towards his locker and on the way see's Sue Sylvester. He overhears a tiny bit of a conversation, as she stares at him going past.

"Ben Israel," Sue says, getting Jacob's attention. "I have a hot tip for your blog."

"You've always been a decent source, what's the angle you wish for me to gossip about?"

"_Glee Club!_" The coach replies with repugnant distain; glaring over at Finn a few feet away. Jacob got an intrigued look on his face as Sue continued, "My office now, Jew Fro!"

* * *

Puck and Rachel are making out on Puck's couch. "I really liked those wine coolers, Puck," Rachel gasps out, her lungs searching for air.

"Yeah, they're really good," Puck concurs. Nuzzling her neck, he tells her, "You're really pretty, Rachel. You're so thin and sexy."

"Mmm," Rachel replies, her eyes wide shut. "I want to keep going," she murmurs, causing Puck's head to pop up.

"What do you mean?" His hands are rubbing up and down her side; alternating between her thigh and just under her breast.

"I want to do **this**…with you," Rachel says softly.

"What about Finn?" He asks with concern.

"What _about _Finn?" Rachel replies as though she doesn't care.

"Are you sure?" Puck questions.

"Yes. We're Jews, its natural," she says seriously, but softly. Puck leans back down and kisses her lips hard, then returns to her neck. "You had a vasectomy, right?" Rachel asks, trying to get his attention.

Puck's head rises as he replies, "I got it. Trust me." He kisses her once more before stating, "This isn't another hook up for me."

"Yes it is," Rachel corrects him. They continue to make out and eventually end up in his bed.

* * *

The glee club met in the auditorium for their Wednesday class. They usually try to have a dress rehearsal of their group numbers at their Thursday afternoon meetings, so Wednesdays are spent going over the choreography. Only, today, with Rachel's absence everything felt off. New Directions was already down a major asset with Kurt long gone, and now with Rachel quitting, they really felt off their game. Even the shamed look on Santana's face proved that things were heading south. Rachel wasn't even in school today so the club could do something about the predicament.

"I hate to admit this, but this routine is not working without Rachel," Tina huffs depressed, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Do you think there's any possibility we can get her back?" Mercedes asked to Mr. Schuester with hope. "I'll apologize to her. I know I was being mean," she says trying to make everything better.

"Oh well that's not going to be a possibility," Sue Sylvester hollered from the back row. All of New Directions turned to Sue as she walked down the aisle to the stage; 'What the Fuck' expressions on all their faces. "You see kiddos, after my newest Cheerio decided to resigned from her elevated status and leave me one gymnast short, I was infuriated, so I followed her after she stormed out of the school crying yesterday because I like to pray on the weak..."

* * *

The car ride had calmed Rachel down as she and Carole headed to the Clinic; rain still pouring down. The Jesus Freaks out in the streets didn't bother Rachel at all since, well, she's a Jew. She wasn't even bothered by the other patrons' fingernails as she waited till she was called into her appointment. She didn't even contemplated leaving as she saw the mother crying waiting for her daughter to finish. Carole quietly read a magazine as she stayed with Rachel.

It was over relatively quickly. Local antistatic and daydreams kept Rachel numb to what was happening to the lower half of her body. She left feeling little queasy, mainly due to the emotional distress, and was given a list of doctors orders as she left. They were still a few necessary procedures Rachel had to do at home for this whole…experience…to be over.

Carole drove her home and helped Rachel into bed. Carole tucked Rachel in as she cried herself asleep again.

"Why does this feel wrong?" Rachel asked Carole between her sobs. Covered up in her blankets, she was shivering; her hair in disarray.

"Because politicians like to scare people into thinking its wrong," Carole replied dramatically. Talking like she was discussing the Boogeyman. Going back into mother-mode she says, "What you did today was brave. A lot of other young woman in your position would not have the guts to do what you did today. You made a smart and admirable decision."

"Then why does it feel like I would get points deducted if this were a test," Rachel ponders.

"Don't think of decisions as tests, it will kill yourself," Carole advises calmly.

Rachel sobs some more till she's asleep. Carole comforting her the whole time. Rachel had never known what it was like to have a 'mother' taking care of her. Rachel loved her dads dearly, and would never replace them in the world, but having an older, wiser, womanly influence on her for this was greatly appreciated. Rachel always respected Carole for being a single mother who lost her husband and still managed to get by okay. Rachel appreciated and admired Carole for how she was helping her. Especially since she was doing so without judgment. Just out of the kindness of her heart.

* * *

In the auditorium, the glee club stood in horror listening to the rest of what Coach Sylvester was advising them and she cackled on, "You see kids Rachel Berry has Finn Hudson's bun in her oven."

The different octave "What's?" harmonized together into one confused grunt.

"Causing Rachel to end the life early, if you know what I mean. And the blogosphere will know very shortly as well."

"Are you serious," Puck asks trying to be aloof, but still showing nervous concern.

"That's impossible," Finn assures the group.

"Honestly Finn, after the whole hot tub incident, do you really think you can confirm that?" Lauren chimes in.

Raising his voice, Finn responded, "Me and Rachel never slept together! We never even did anything close to that!"

"Well than can you explain why Rachel was seen going with your mother to an abortion clinic where she did in fact have an appointment?" Coach Sylvester accuses rhetorically.

"What?" the group echoes again.

"It's not Finn's! It's mine!" Puck yells, silencing the madness. "I told Rachel it was safe because of my vasectomy which I was actually too nervous to go through." The entire group stares at Puck in disbelief. They then all proceed – in unison – to look over at Finn and the rage in his demeanor.

Finn was halfway across the stage to pound Pucks head in. Still feeling the systems of illness, a coughing fit halted him midway. It didn't matter though, because Quinn had already tackled Puck.

"YOU ASSHOLE!" the fair-haired cheerleader cried out, her jacket falling off her shoulders and her skirt flying up.

Sam watched in horror as his girlfriend beat the crap out of the first-string linebacker.

"How could you do that to her?" Quinn ranted loudly. "What? Are you not going to be happy until you've fertilized every girl in this school? 'Get em' Drunk and Knock em' Up' is that your new motto?" She was screaming on the top of her lungs as she sat on him; punching him with all her might. The long stream of rhetorical questions echoing around the auditorium. "Why don't you just start killing them off like Phillip Markoff? At least then you would be saving them the embarrassment!"

At some point Artie started to film this with his smart phone as the club watched in horror. It even took Mr. Schuester a good 50 seconds before he pried Quinn off of him.

"Okay, Quinn, that's enough," said Schue as he pulled Quinn off Puck, trying to calm her down.

"NO IT'S NOT!" she cried out, trying to lunge back at him, but was restrained.

As Quinn's blood boiled – and the other's were entranced by the display before them – Finn quietly left. No one noticing. He needed to tell Rachel what was happening. He knew that was his responsibility as a leader of this group and as her best friend. Finn felt terrible inside. This must be what it was like to tell someone their loved one passed away. Being the bearer of bad news seemed like the worst responsibility to Finn Hudson.

Finn had started to stalk down the hall to find Jew Fro, but it was too late. Jacob had already left and in mere minutes Rachel's secret was going to be all over the World Wide Web. Crushing her even more than High School already had.

* * *

Rachel was curled up ironically in the fetal position all day as she listed to the same song playing over and over on repeat. Holding herself together, hoping to keep her body intact. She didn't want to fall apart.

_It's funny how I'm not mad at Puck. I'm mad at myself. And it's not even over yet; I still have a lot more I need to do to get over this. And I'm gonna be bleeding for like 3-weeks or something until my body adjusts. My period for three weeks! It's madness! Carole stopped by during her lunch hour to check up on me. She keeps telling me I'm being brave, but I feel more like a coward. I can't stop thinking about that evening with Puck. The images are haunting me and all I want to do is run away. The image of his face hovering over mine before he kissed me and we began. Puck's smell and how I wished so much that I smelled Finn. What upsets me the most is that it was consensual. He didn't pressure me that much. Okay, yeah, I was feeling the effects of those highly disgusting, syrupy wine coolers, but the fact of the matter was... I wanted to. I wanted to 'man up' (for lack of better term) and do it. I wanted to feel something other than the pain of no longer being with Finn. And then I ended up feeling nothing. It's funny how things can be ironic. Oooh, this is my favorite part. _

_reasons like seasons  
they constantly change  
and the seasons of last year  
like reasons have floated away  
away with this spilt milk  
away with this dirty dish water, away  
seventeen years, and all that he gave was a daughter_

"it's me and the moon," she says  
I got no trouble with that  
but I am a butterfly, you wouldn't let me die  
"it's me and the moon," she says

Rachel continues to sing "Me and the Moon" by Something Corporate, the lyrics filling the house as Finn enters. Hearing her voice is almost like a sound of relief. It's comforting to know that she still has her most cherished gift. Finn walks up to her room and see's Rachel lying in bed singing along to herself.

"Hi," he says getting her attention.

Rachel pops up and sits upright; startled. "What are you doing here?" she asks as she covers herself up with her bed linens, even though she's wearing thick flannel pajamas.

"I have to tell you something, Rachel. Something bad," Finn says calmly bracing himself...before sneezing.

"Bless you," she says with a hopeful smile; ignorant.

"Look Rachel... Sue Sylvester found out," Finn sits down on the edge of the bed. Keeping his voice even. Trying so hard to do so. Not wanting to scare her.

"Found out what?" Rachel questions', prying it's not what she think it is.

"She found out about what happened to you...And what you did...Only she thought it was mine, not Pucks..."

"Oh, God..." was all Rachel could think to say.

"Sue told that Jacob kid..." Rachel sat stunned as Finn continued. "It's already on his Glee blog. Rachel, I'm so sorry..."

She couldn't help it, she was crying. _Again..._

Finn moved over to her and scooped Rachel up in his arms as she cried. "I'm so sorry," he repeated. "I'm sorry for what he did to you."

"It's not his fault," she mumbled into Finn's chest.

"Yes, it is."

"No! Its not." she reprimands, getting in the last word. "How did you find out?"

"Sue told us during rehearsal. Only she thought it was mine I guess because we dated. Then Puck admitted it was his." Finn still held her as her tears subsided, caressing her hair.

"Your mom helped me. Maybe that's why," Rachel explains.

"My Mom?"

"Yeah, I needed to talk to someone. I needed someone else's help and she there for me. She's really wonderful."

"Yeah," Finn agrees.

"Did you hurt him? Puck?" Rachel asks, hoping she's wrong.

"I didn't have to," he answers, smirking into Rachel's hair.

"I'm glad," Rachel said with relief.

"Quinn got to him first."

"What?" she says with a laugh, picking her head up.

"Oh yeah, she beat the crap out of him. It was pretty entertaining."

"You can't be serious?"

"He is," Quinn interjects from Rachel's doorway, looking ragged. Hair is disarray. Startling Finn and Rachel. "You should really lock your door," she suggests.

"That's a good idea," Rachel responds, surprised to see Quinn.

"Can I speak to Rachel alone for a few minutes?" Quinn asks Finn.

"Yeah, sure," he replies, breaking his grip from Rachel. "I'll be right downstairs," he says to the brunette.

"Okay..." Rachel says as he walks out.

Quinn closes the door behind him and walks up to Rachel. She sits down on the bed and gives her a long hug.

"Why are you doing this?" Rachel asks, her body stiff as a board; her eyes shifting from side to side.

"Because I know how you feel," Quinn replies.

"Are you made at me?" she questioned doe eyed, hoping for pity. Breaking apart from Quinn's grip.

"Mad at you? Why would I be mad at you?" Quinn asks, making herself comfortable. Propping her back against the headboard and crossing her legs over the comforter.

"Well, you and Puck have a past and I don't want to step on your toes."

"Rachel, I have a boyfriend. And even when Puck and I were 'together', we were never officially together. Plus, he had bi-daily rendezvous with Santana."

"Oh." Rachel processes. "So why are you here?"

"Like I said, I know how you feel..."

"I don't even know how I feel," Rachel said honestly.

"Yep, I know that feeling, too. What you did was brave."

"It was cowardly."

"No! It was brave. Trust me. I have faith and beliefs I respect them, but there were so many times. So, so many times that I contemplated what you did. Especially when I was still with Finn. You were brave because you actually went through with it. You thought about where you were in your life and what you wanted to accomplish and did something about it."

"But you did the same thing. And you gave a life to someone who was desperate for it. That's brave and caring."

"Yeah, but it was hard. Really hard. And even now after the fact I'm still not sure I made the right choice."

"I'm not sure I made the right choice either." Rachel leans her head on Quinn's shoulder.

"You probably never will be..." Quinn chimed in an all-knowing manner, rubbing Rachel's upper arm.

"You didn't have to beat up Puck, ya know," Rachel says, trying to change the subject. "It wasn't his fault. I mean, yeah, I'm pissed that he lied about his vasectomy, but we still should have used protection. And the thing is that…I wanted to. He asked me if I was sure and I said yes. I could have been smart and insisted he use protection anyway, but I didn't."

"He still should have been honest to you about his...procedure...though."

"Yeah, but it still doesn't deny the fact that I was still a major player in this whole situation."

"It never will," Quinn chirps wisely.

"I just wanted to feel something. Something other than the pain I was feeling of loosing Finn. I miss him _so_ much. Puck's not even as good of a kisser..."

"Don't I know it..." Quinn sasses.

Rachel smiles. "You would think with all the girls he made out with, he'd be better at that. Not that he's bad, he's just not as good as Finn."

"True."

"We've kissed two of the same boys; that seems weird," Rachel muses.

"Ah, people rotate boyfriends all the time," Quinn shrugs. "Just ask Brittany and Santana."

"So... did you really beat the carp out of him?" Rachel asks genuinely curious.

"Oh, yeah. Artie even taped it and posted it on You Tube," the blond says with pride.

Rachel lets out a laugh. "It is sad that I find that amusing?"

"Ah, he had it coming. If it wasn't me, it was going to be someone else." After that the girls are quiet for a while. Sitting. Contemplating.

* * *

Finn patiently waited in Rachel's living room. Keeping guard for intruders as he waited for the girls to finish; glad he was ignorant of what they were discussing. He figured it had to do with Rachel's former physical state, but he really didn't want to know more than that.

Quinn leaves a little while later, so does Finn. But not before Finn notifies Rachel that Jacob updated his blog and corrected which jock 'sperminated' Rachel Berry. Jacob's words, not Finn's. Rachel went back to resting. Needing the comfort of dreams for her to ignore reality. The pain that her private business being out there for the whole world to see. By following morning, besides the McKinley gossip mill brewing, "Cheerleader Beats up Linebacker" already had 700,000 hits.

* * *

**A/N:** Okay, so Rachel did get pregnant, like I know several of you didn't want, but she only knew she was in that physical state for about 24 hours. Please review and let me know what you think. I really liked this chapter and I hope you did too. Oh, and Philip Markoff is 'The Craigslist Killer'. I was a senior in college in Boston when that was all going down so I was personally excited to put that in. Anyway, what do you want to see happen next? Let me know!


	6. Chapter 6

**Authors Note:** Thanks for reading. I didn't get that many reviews for the previous chapter, so please respond and let me know what you are thinking. It's really great to get feedback. Good or bad. I hope you enjoy.

**Disclaimer:** Ryan Murphy you should really put _Glee_ up to be publicly traded. It would be better for you and your fans in the long run.

* * *

The 12th Article of The Universal Declaration of Human Rights, one of the first major actions of the United Nations once formed states the following:

_No one shall be subjected to arbitrary interference with his privacy, family, home or correspondence, nor to attacks upon his honour and reputation. Everyone has the right to the protection of the law against such interference or attacks._

The Barry's, as well-educated gentlemen, were well aware of this document and what this article protects to an individual's personal life. S, when Mr. and Mr. Berry found out that their precious star Rachel was slanderously written about on a gossip blog, and that a paid member of the William McKinley faculty was the main source for this unreached article, they took drastic measures. With the full support of the Ohio Civil Liberties Union behind them.

* * *

Rachel Berry went back to school about a week and half after her procedure. Her body needed time to recover and so did her emotions. She was the center of a school scandal unlike one she ever thought she would happen to 'little ol' Rachel'. Every so often Rachel found herself wondering if this whole experience would end up in her young-talent-on-the-rise exposé in _Vanity Fair_.

Sporadically several members of New Directions came to visit Rachel while she was home, each of them subtlety trying to convince her back into the club. But, even though she missed it, she wasn't sure she could do it anymore. Even though Finn has said he wasn't mad at her – that they were broken up and it wasn't his place to pass judgment – she still wasn't sure. They had been really mean to her, and there was only so much of that even Rachel Berry could take. Puck even stopped by to apologize, where in which Rachel insisted that it wasn't his entire fault, but that she was pretty pissed that he lied about his seamen status.

Rachel was well aware as to what her parents were up to and purposely tried to keep low profile. She knew several members of the school would be upset about what was going on behind-the-scenes. Then again, she also knew there were several people who would call her a savor. Rachel knew that Sue Sylvester wasn't _all_ bad, but what the cheerleading coach had done crossed too many lines and that type of behavior had to be punished, no matter what the age or status.

"Hey Rachel," Finn says as she gets some books out of her locker.

"Hey Finn," she repeats.

"So...how has your first day back been?" he asks as they start down the hall.

"Odd," she replies for lack of a better word.

"Yeah, I kinda know how you feel. The day after everything went down with Quinn, I had a really hard time getting though the day."

Somehow what Finn said endured Rachel to him. It made sense somehow in relation to what Rachel was going through. "Yeah. Thanks."

"What class do you have instead of Glee now?" Finn was being curious.

"Just study hall. This semester has been really been busy, so I need the extra time for school work," Rachel explains as they continue down the hall.

"Oh. Well I guess there is no way of getting you to stop by rehearsal today?" Finn tries to be hopeful putting on a sad puppy dog face and his patented half-grin.

Rachel stops walking. "Is that the only reason you even bothered to speak to me?" She asks anger in her voice.

"No. Of course not. I know what's going on and you're one of my friends and I want to make sure your okay. But, as Captain of the Glee Club, I also have an obligation to those involved to try to recruit the best performers in the school," Finn explains; anger in his voice as well. "You are still the best singer in this school despite not being in Glee anymore and since you quit we are still one member short and Glee is still not a club people are running to join, Rachel. I understand your decisions and respect them, but you still put us in a tough position when you quit!"

"Is that the only the reason why you weren't mad at me when you found out about Puck and I? Because you wanted me back in Glee?" she was interrogating him, wanting answers.

"No, I wasn't mad at you because I have no business intervening in whatever decisions you make regarding your body! And after what happened when the whole world found out your personal business, I was there for you as a friend supporting you just like you were there for me after the whole world found about Quinn." Finn walked off after explaining his motives, annoyed by her assumptions.

Rachel hated the fact that his logic made sense. That the good-hearted boy she was in love with was still there. She also hated the fact that now he was the sole captain of New Directions and their co-captainship that she always secretly loved no longer existed. Standing in the hallway alone, Rachel realized that while she was recuperating, life around her was still going on, and she needed to find her place back in the world of McKinley High.

* * *

Sue Sylvester was summoned down to Figgins' Office with a stern a look on the Principle face. In a rare occurrence, Coach Beiste and William were not in attendance; however Bryan Ryan was sitting on the couch starring with extreme intensity as Sue walks in.

"Take a seat, Sue" Principle Figgins requests; gesturing to one of the seats in front of his desk.

"Okay. May I ask what this is about?" Sue glares as she takes her stat, questioning the need for her presence.

"Did you notify _Jacob Ben Israel's Big Gay Glee Blog_ that Rachel Berry had an abortion without getting her consent on the matter?" Bryan Ryan asks, fast and stern, his eyes as daggers.

"Is this what this is about? Rachel disappointed me. I gave her the chance to be a Cheerio and then she went and got knocked up instead. I have no tolerance for Cheerios ruining their lives," Coach Sylvester explains with disgust.

"Had she already resigned for being a Cheerio before she had the procedure done?" Mr. Figgins asks.

"Yes, but she still was degrading what the Cheerios stand for," Sue sneers.

"Her parents are suing the school for slander and volitions of human rights against the school. And they are also suing the Lima Department of Education because we did not intervene sooner," Bryan Ryan explains.

"Gay parents...always think their kids are so special..." She trails off.

"We're offering you a severance package and benefits as well as pension pay for the rest of the year," Bryan Ryan says nonchalantly; as if he assumes Sue knows to expect this.

"_I beg your pardon_?" She questions, standing up and looking over to Bryan. She wasn't expecting early retirement.

"For your resignation..." Mr. Ryan continues, as if he wasn't interrupted.

"_**I beg your pardon?**_" Sue repeats herself, raising her voice, gripping the back of the chair.

"Sue, its either this or the Barry's take this case to court, where in which that happens, the district is required to immediately terminate you, without benefits or severance, due to possible endangerment of a student," Figgins explains, sitting proud at his seat.

"I got the Glee Club a second year; did you tell her parents that? That their precious baby girl wouldn't even have Glee Club if it wasn't without me?"

"That doesn't matter Sue," Bryan Ryan explains. "First of all because Rachel is no longer a member of that one-way-ticket to Hell that is Glee, but also because her parents have proof that you were trying to damage the reputation of a student that immediately puts you in breach of contract."

"So what? I've damaged the reputation of dozens of students who've graced these halls, why is this suddenly becoming an issue now?" Sue's blood boiled as they continued to explain the circumstances of her actions.

"Because, Sue, those parents never took legal action!" Figgins intervenes.

"I will not stand for this!" Sue replies, standing her ground.

"Well, once again Sue, you really don't have a choice. It's either this or immediate termination. Plus, we've have been granted permission, that if we deem necessary, to have you escorted off the campus by security if you are getting too out of hand while leaving the premises," Bryan explains.

"This is not over!" Sue shouts, pointing at Mr. Figgins and Mr. Ryan before marching out of the Principal's Office, flinging a student who dared to cross her path.

"Not the children, Sue," Figgins' chirps out from his desk.

"Yeah, please apprehend Coach Sylvester. Over and out," Bryan says into a walkie-talkie.

* * *

25 minutes later Coach Sylvester was done packing up her office and exiled from William McKinley High School. The opinions of her dismissal were mixed. Several students, faculty, and staff loved Sue for what she had done for the cheerleading program and athletics at the school. Several others thought she was a bully and that karma finally came around and punished her for her actions. Either way the damage had been done and Rachel was bracing herself for the consequences. The backlash.

Slamming Rachel's locker shut, just missing her nose, Santana is in full Battle Bitch Mode as she confronts Rachel for getting Sue kicked out. "How could you do that?" Santana asks, demanding Rachel attention.

"She aired my personal business, incorrectly I might add, for the whole world to see. My dads felt repercussions should be taken for such actions and I didn't disagree." Rachel stands her ground as she explains her feelings on the matter, confidant in her opinion.

"You got someone fired. Don't you even care?" Santana was being too bitchy to even act as though she cared.

"She slandered my existence! She personally attacked me! No educator should be allowed to educate if that is the example display!" Rachel was getting angrier by the minute.

"I don't know why you even care anymore," Santana interjects. "You quit the Cheerios! You know what; I don't know why I'm even having this conversation with you. You're not hot. You're not sexy. You and you're scraped out uterus are really just a waste of oxygen in my opinion. Planned Parenthood, really?" Santana tries to saunter off, breezing past Rachel, but stops herself as Rachel beings to speak.

"But don't you go there for your bi-weekly Chlamydia treatments?" Rachel asks rhetorically, regaining Santana's attention, as the Latina turns intrigued. "I'm sure with all the dicks you've had inside you, you must be riffled with STS's." At this point, the majority of the McKinley student body is entranced by the catfight a-brewin'.

"_Excuse me?_" Santana interrogates.

"You think you're so powerful because you've had all this sex, right?" Rachel continues her voice even and confidant; projecting down the hall. "Well, you're not. The guys at this school just think of you as a humping post. And some of the girls too, I shouldn't discriminate. People don't respect you, they just see you as a way of getting off," Rachel explains.

"You think you're so powerful because you got a teacher fired."Santana was eerily calm. "You don't know me and you ruined the lives of several students by getting rid of their coach. Ms. Sylvester was the person who made me the athlete I am today," Santana clarifies, changing the subject. The school was still watching display. Wondering if it was going to get to blows.

"Didn't Sue nearly kick you off the squad because of your own personal choice? Do you truly think that she was the reason you are a better athlete or because of your own talent?" Rachel was really trying to get under Santana's skin. To let her know how it feels. "Sure mentors and leaders are important, but do you think you will be so bad off without them."

"Maybe," Santana answers. "I think that Mr. Schue was smart in giving me a solo at Sectionals. And I think he made us all better singers."

"True," Rachel concurs. "But can you say the same thing about Sue and Cheer?"

The question Rachel posed to Santana stood in the air, as she was afraid to respond. The Cheerio, still in her pristine uniform walked away; not defeated, but confused. Santana stopped battling with Rachel after that. It was then when Santana realized that Rachel was going to fight back. Both had enough ammunition to take out an army, but neither wanted to start another war.

After a few weeks of not-so-subtle persuasion, culminating with New Directions performing "Memories" by Barbra Streisand as a way to ruse Rachel back, she finally rejoined Glee Club. Just in time for Regionals.

* * *

**A/N:** I just want to say that I do love Santana and Sue, because like any lover of literature I appreciate a good antagonist (and they are great ones), but in this story they were the main villains and they needed do get their actions rectified. Please review and let me know what you thought.


	7. Epilogue

**Authors Note:** This is the last section. I know the chapters for this story were much shorter than I usually write, but that's just how I envisioned it. I really hope you enjoy and let me know what think. I really enjoyed writing this.

**Disclaimer:** Ryan Murphy you should really put _Glee_ up to be publicly traded. It would be better for you and your fans in the long run.

* * *

They had won Regionals! None of the students could believe it! Kurt cheered respectively as he saw his former Glee Club jump and cheer as they accepted their trophy. This meant that New Directions was headed off to New York, and for more members of the club than they would admit, the first time they were getting out of Ohio and seeing a new world.

Finn was entranced by the large city. The ethic cultures. The amazing taste of a bagel. The crowds and the noise. He was in love with it all and surprised by how he felt so comfortable there. Finn never figured himself as someone who would enjoy city life as much as he enjoys the suburbs, but being in New York, he never felt more at home. Finn could see himself there forever and he enjoyed that feeling.

Rachel thought it was _so cute_ that Finn was so elated by New York. She had every intention of calling Manhattan home someday and it warmed her heart that her best friend was excited about being there too. After all the drama that happened to Rachel, Finn had somehow forgiven her and let it go, but he made it clear that he didn't want to go back to dating again. Finn was thankful that he and Rachel were able to salvage their friendship, and he didn't want that to be damaged. Rachel, unfortunately, had to respect Finn's stance on the subject, but she would lying if she was less than thrilled. She wanted more. Just like she did in the past.

Finn, Rachel, and the rest of New Directions were enjoying their field trip to New York. They had a whole week there to explore new things and see the sights. One afternoon, walking out of their 35th Street hotel heading down to the Subway, Rachel had an idea as to how she and Finn could spend their afternoon now that rehearsal is over for the day.

"Hey Finn, she says getting his attention as he's about to swipe his Metro Card. "You wanna have the best 6 dollar sandwich of your life?" she asks.

"Yeah!" he replies with boyish excitement as they break apart from the rest of the pack and head towards the downtown B,D, F Orange Line.

* * *

"So where are you taking me?" Finn asks once they take their seats on the train.

"Just a few stops away," Rachel nonchalantly responds.

Once they arrive at the Broadway-Lafayette stop, Finn's poor sense of direction goes into overload as he looks out the busy SoHo intersection.

"Follow me," Rachel commands, turgidly pulling him by the arm as they wait for the walk symbol to flash.

* * *

It's a very quick two blocks to their destination at the Cosby Connection, a little sandwich shop located inside a small local theater. The cafe with mosaic tile tables, colorful artwork, and large windows feels comforting in its miss-matched atmosphere.

Digging into his large chicken pesto sandwich Finn asks, "So, did you find this place because it's inside a theater?"

"No, I found this place because they were giving out menus by the subway one time when I was here with my dad's. They had a decent vegan sandwich selection and everything's 6 dollars; we had to check it out. Even since I try to come here whenever I visit," Rachel explains.

"What were you doing in this part of the City? I thought you were obsessed with Broadway and Times Square."

"I am, but since I have every intention of making this island my home, I have personally put forth an effort to see several of the neighborhoods of Manhattan. Plus, this area has the best shopping. And there's a Planned Parenthood across the street. My favorite place in the world," Rachel retorts sarcastically.

Finn smirks. He's already gobbled up his whole big meal whereas Rachel can hardly finish one half. "So, where are we off to next?"

"Well... there's someplace I would like to show you, if you want to go, that is..." Rachel was trying had to stay in the 'friends zone' but sometimes with the history they have, that is harder said than done.

"Yeah, I would love to," Finn replies surprised by her nervousness.

"Prefect, it's not too far."

The twosome got up and head out of the theater, walking back towards Houston.

* * *

"So... are you going to tell me _where_ we are going...?" Finn inquires as they start walking. The warm Spring sun shining on their faces.

"No." Rachel replies. "There's the Whole Foods on The Bowery," the petite brunette points out as they walk towards the building. "We'll have to stop there later and get some organic chocolate."

"Okay," Finn says as he follows her, turning down on to Elizabeth St. They continue down the block past the shop with the fancy cartoon underwear.

"That's the Elizabeth St. Tory Burch Flagship," Rachel points out the orange doored building as she stops on the opposite side of the street. "It doesn't make any money." Getting a strange look from Finn as her observation she finishes with, "Your brother would care."

"Oh," Finn mumbles with a nodded head. Rachel goes into her purse and pulls out her keys. "Rachel, what are you doing?" he asks as she puts them into lock and opens the door.

"Well this is where I wanted to take you," She says full of glee as she holds the door open for Finn. Leading him to the stairs of the walk up Rachel starts climbing as they head up. "You see, my dad had a sister Emily who I remember vaguely from when I was a little girl. She lived in Manhattan. She was the person who took me to my first Broadway show," Rachel says poignantly mid staircase, turning around to Finn in dramatic fashion; her skirt flying up. "Anyway, ever since that day, I decided I was to become a Broadway star. I had always been interesting in singing and dancing, but seeing those actors up on that stage is still my first memory of needing to perform. And my best memory."

"Okay..."

"Anyway, about 8-years-ago Aunt Emily got diagnosed with a rare illness, I don't remember what it was, but she lost her life."

"Oh..." Finn says with sadness as Rachel turns off from the landing and towards one of the doors.

"And in her Will, she left me apartment 4B," Rachel finishes, gesturing to the apartment.

"So, wait, this is your own apartment?" Finn asks in disbelief.

"Welcome," Rachel smirks and she lets him in.

* * *

Finn stood in awe of the small, but spacious space. There was no furniture, but it felt like Rachel just from the atmosphere. It had a decent-sized living room with hardwood floors and large widows. Off from there was the kitchen.

"Let me get this straight, you live here?"

"Well, not exactly. There's no heat, electricity, or cable. I live in Lima, but yes, this is my own property. Fully-paid mortgage and all. When I graduate and move to New York, this will be home. My perfect one bedroom," she muses as she spreads her arms out and spins around the living room. Eye shut tight, head straight up at the ceiling.

Finn stood against the counter in the kitchen open from the family room watch Rachel in awe. It was like he was seeing her for the first time. And he finally understood what that analogy even meant.

"Hey Rach," Finn said getting her attention.

"Yeah?" Rachel replied, stopping mid-spin.

"Thank-you for taking me here; in means a lot," he said calmly, meaning every word.

"You're the only person I wanted to take here," she comments with a shy smile.

"I know that it's after the fact, but I just want to let you know that it didn't mean anything. When I slept with Santana that is. It didn't mean anything. I was just so hurt that you were dating Jesse and all I wanted to do was feel something else besides the pain of losing you, so I thought sleeping with someone else, and sharing that intimacy would help, but it didn't. In fact it made everything so much worse. And I'm so sorry that I lied to you. I should have told you when admitted what you _didn't_ do with Jesse. No, in fact, I should have admitted what I did when we first started dating, but I was just scared that you would get **so** mad that you would break-up with me and tar and feather me or something. And I was** so** afraid of losing you once we were _finally, truly_ together that I would do anything to keep us from moving apart. To be completely honest, I'm pretty sure was more of virgin after I left that experience than before."

"I don't think that's possible Finn," Rachel interjects.

"I think it is. I'm not even sure why I'm telling you all of this...I guess I just wanted you to know..." Finn looked at her like a scared little boy as he admitted his deep, dark secret to her in one long, winding confession.

Rachel looked down at her feet, while plating with the hem of her sweater as she processed all that Finn had told her. Did he want to get back together? Did he just want to get that off his chest? Rachel was unsure, but felt unfortunately that it was the latter. Looking back up at him, he looked at her perplexed as she contemplated what he divulged.

"Why are you telling me" she asked; confusion in her voice.

"Well, I don't know. I guess because you took me here and shared this with me, I wanted to share something secret with you too..." To be honest, Finn was unsure what to make of the situation as well.

Rachel walks up to Finn and wraps her arms around him in a long hug; he head resting on his shoulder. "I'm glad you told me," Rachel comments.

"I'm glad you took me here," Finn replies.

They didn't make love. They didn't make-out. They didn't even kiss. They just stay in their embrace a little while longer – holding each other up – and they went back uptown to meet with the others. They had a competition tomorrow.

* * *

They had come in second. New Directions, the little Underdog Glee Club from Lima, Ohio had come in second in a National Show Choir competition. The overwhelming joy that the club exuded lasted all night as they celebrated way into the wee hours of morning. They had 24 more hours in New York until they had to check-out and head back to Lima. Dispersed all over the City, the Glee Club all came up with their own way to celebrate with one, big dance party in Brittany's room that night.

When Rachel headed out early from the festivities, Finn followed behind worried that she felt left out.

"No, not at all," she comments as she swipes her key to enter her and Quinn's room. Finn was rooming with Sam and the others were staying with different members of the club. Most of whom they swapped keys with. "I'm just really tired," Rachel explains as she heads in, holding the door for Finn.

"Are you sure?" he asks as he follows her into the room. The heavy door shuts as Rachel goes into her suitcase at the end of the bed.

"Yeah, I'm sure. It's just been a long week and I'm tired," she says rationally. "I'm gonna change. Make yourself comfortable," she insists as she gestures to the bed.

Finn was sitting upright against the headboard, with his legs draped over the mattress flipping though the channels. Rachel walks back in wearing an adorable pajama outfit, her face flushed and damp from just washing it. The energy in the room changed from friendly and comfortable to something different. Strong and magnetic.

Rachel popped up and sat with her knees bent as she takes the remote from Finn "Anything good on?" she asks as she plays with the buttons.

"Not really," Finn replies as he pulls his iPhone from his pocket and mounts it into the alarm clock. "Do you just want to listen to music and hang out?" Finn asks.

"Okay..." Rachel complies.

It's suddenly painfully awkward.

"Finn," Rachel says with searching doe eye, getting his attention.

"Yeah?"

And then she kissed him. Hard. It had been months since their mouths touched and the kinetic energy was electric.

Breaking apart, Rachel shakes her head. "I'm so sorry I don't know what came over me. I just missed you and wanted to do that. And feel that. And I'm—" Rachel was cut off mid sentence with Finn's lips forcefully back on hers.

It took Finn a second or two to open his eyes and pick his jaw once Rachel breaks apart from him and starts rambling. In the middle of her babbling apology, Finn presses his lips back on to hers with all his might. Wanting to feel that again as well.

* * *

Wrapping her arms his neck, Finn and Rachel keep their lips locked together as they move back onto the mattress. Their feet kicking the pillows as Rachel's head rested against the edge. Finn broke apart for air and nuzzled her nose with his as she wrapped her leg around his; her heel digging into his calf. He nuzzled and sucked her neck as Rachel rubbed her arms up and down his back.

"There's condoms in Quinn's bag," Rachel comments limply moving her arm off Finn's shoulder to point at corner.

"How do you know that?" Finn asks slyly into Rachel neck.

"Don't ask," Rachel moans into Finn ear.

Somehow that was when Finn knew Rachel was being serious. Moving his head up to look at her – her flushed cheeks, her swollen lips, her hair sprawled out over the think, luxurious linens – he knew she wanted this. And he wanted it too. They looked at one another with gentle confidence, full of joy and excitement, as they silently made a decision. Walking over to find what he was hoping for, Rachel made herself comfortable against the pillows as Finn walked back over to her. They laid back down on the bed as the music filled the silence.

Finn kissed her and touched her as they discarded their clothes. Rachel moaned and shook as fondled and explored one another. When he pushed himself inside her and started to thrust, Rachel withered as she found his rhythm, breathing in his intoxicating scent. Finn groaned when Rachel wrapped her leg around him, drawing him closer. Quivering beneath him, hearing her moan into his ear as his nose buried into the side of her neck, neither one of them thought anything was better than this; as they shared their relaxing actions and their addictive high in the end.

"I'm glad I chose to do that with you," Rachel says as her breathing returns to normal.

"I'm glad I chose to do that with you too," Finn concurs as his heart rate slows down.

A little while later Rachel rested against Finn's bare chest as he asks, "How do you feel?" The music still playing.

"Different," she murmurs with a grin; her cheek still against his chest. "How do you feel?"

"Different," he concurs. "Only is a good type of different," Finn wisely muses.

Raising her head and look up at him she comments that, "It a **great** type of different."

* * *

**A/N:** This is the end. I really enjoyed writing this and I hope you enjoyed reading it. Did you love it? Hate it? Please review and let me know. I've had a few ideas for some different types of stories and I want to know if you want to hear from my voice. Thanks again!


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